CBGC Youth Camp 2009 can be summarized in one word - AWESOME. The camp that many prepared for and anticipated has come and gone. Sigh...wish the camp would never end. Time just never seems to be enough. It just passes so so quickly. Its like you're complaining to yourself that you've to wake up at 7 smtg and the next moment its like~WHAT??? Its night already? Yeah...Its THAT fast.
I don't want to make any comparison to previous camps because i feel that each camp has its own purpose and each camp is special in its own way. This camp was themed "the x-treme makeover" and it did live up to its name.
I could really feel the presence of God in this camp and i know that in one way or another, many people did experience a makeover of their own. God works in many different ways in different people's lives, mine included. God was just so AWESOME. Thank you God for everything You've done in the camp. Everyone was blessed. =)
To all cell leaders,
Where would we committees and group leaders be without each and every one of you? You all are the ones that brought us up, leading us in the right direction, showing us the way to the Lord. Thank you so much. I know some of you have to actually take your precious leave just to be in the camp with us. In the camp, all of you were a great inspiration too. Helping around, dealing with matters. Many campers don't even realise how much you all did, but God was there watching. =) Thank you once again.
To all camp committees,
Wai Kit,
hmmm...i wonder how many people in this whole wide world could actually take over your place? hehe... You're just such a blessing to CGBC youth, you always were. God has used you in such a wonderful and effective way. You've been such a blessing to so many people. Don't believe? Just ask a few and you'll know. =) You are such an inspiration to many(myself included), and i'm sure you will become what you've always wanted to be~INFLUENTIAL. Forget the famous and prominent part la, trust me it doesn't help. haha... Just want to thank you for being such a wonderful friend and camp commander in this camp. Thank you so so much. You played a big part in making me what i am today. Well, you influenced me, in a good way la.
Samuel,
Another individual that is and has been and is still being used by the almighty God up till today!!! Can see you being a great servant of God in the future. You have by no doubts used your talents to the fullest!!! God is proud that you have used your talent to such big measures. I'm sure He'll inspire you to write more songs for Him in the future.
Jean Li,
The chatterbox =P. A good one though. Really respect the way you deal with tough situations. You have a way of talking which...i dunno...calms the raging seas? XD!!! Really appreciate your crap and jokes that enlightens others moods and spirit. Shy on the outside, outgoing on the inside. =)
Vincent, Sunny, Rena, Rachel,
Thanks so much for the booklet and name tags. Not forgetting the wonderful idea you guys came out for the name tags. Really bonded everyone together. =)
Adrian and Joel,
A big thank you to you guys too for making sounds sound like sounds and making pictures look like pictures. (LOL) XD!!!
Kerry and Sabrina,
Bau zou pohs...Thank you for bau zou-ing for this years camp. Guess it was worth it since SOMEONE had the priviledge to go taiwan instead. Well, you missed a great camp, and we missed you too. =)
Zach,
What can i say? You've been such a great example of what a real gentleman is like. Doing the games for the first time, you did a great job. (SALUTE) Sorry for not helping you that much though. Really appreciate you brother.
Other committees that i missed out,
You guys done a great job in making the camp a success too!!! THANK YOU!!!
Group leaders,
I'm going to express this in general. (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE). As i looked back to the camp, seeing so many taking a step furthur into being a worrior for the Lord, just brings a smile to my little face. =) Although sometimes things might seem tough, or you think that something is impossible for you to handle...always remember this, WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE. For some of you its the second time and i could really see an improvement from the first time you guys were group leaders. Some of you just don't know your potentials. And after the camp, i'm sure you all know your potentials better right?
Some of you were complaining about certain members in your group. Well, how did it turn out? It wasn't THAT bad after all right? You have to just surrender everything to God and just let Him do the rest. When you have faith in yourself and in God, you will have the VICTORY. Heard some of you were facing some attitude members and were criticised. Don't let those comments affect you as you are still growing in the Lord. For those who couldn't think you can do it, in the end you did it didn't you. Even leading your group to a certain victory. =) Things just goes beyond your expectations. And once again this was proved through this camp.
'You can do it", thats what i always tell some of you when you were doubting yourselves. Why am i so sure? because what you think you can do, God can do it better! Many times better. And He will do it through you too! Our God is a BIG God. What can prove too difficult for Him?
Many things can be taken delight from this camp. There were just so many people that i didn't even get the chance to know even half of the people who were there. Sorry people. May we know each other in time to come.
Just want to say another big THANK YOU to everyone once again. Sorry if i had offended any of you throughout the camp. All praises to God!!! =) Period.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
update =)
tick tock tick tock (clock ticking)...time passes by so quickly...SO quickly...sometimes it just feels like time has picked up pace and has become faster than normal. Sometimes i just wish one week has more days in it. Time passes by so quickly that in the blink of an eye it is already another month. For those peeps who are having ur "wonderful hols" better enjoy it to the fullest man. Its already December, and before you know it. You'll be in school and you'll be thinking...Gosh...it feels like i was just here yesterday...LOL.
and talking bout time passing by quickly, it just occured to me that, as each second that passes by, i or in other words everyone, is not growing any younger. As each second passs by, we are growing a second older, a minute older, an hour, a day older, a week older, a month older, a fortnight older, a year older, a century older, a millenium older...ok i was crapping. Point is, we thihnk we have time and chance to do things at a later time in our lives, well sory to tell you, you're wrong...WRONGGGGGG. Time is never on our side, if you wanna do something, you better do it quickly. If you are afraid of doing something or uncertain, either you skip that thought or you don't do it at all. Simple right =P.
OK. Enough of that time goes by quickly part. I will let you ppl decide what to agree to. Either you're with me or you're with Madonna. =)
I will now write what my title says i will write which is what i wrote on my title bar...er...ok. As of today (8 December 2009), I am alive and well (DUH). Well, its already week 8 in my sem. Things are not getting any easier, nor is my time being more UNoccupied. Many ppl who were in short sem, including my bro, have already finish their sem and will be facing their finals next week. All the best everyone!!! =) The force(God) is with you. *their sem break will be one whole month~~NO FAIR!!! =( *
I am already becoming a cute little panda as each day passes by. =) Gosh~~Lord i really need You. "For the JOY of the LORD is my STRENGTH" Yay!!! Joy cell GO!!! =) OK. Nvrmind. I was talking to myself.
So...i am getting busier and i am really starting to treasure those presious time with my friends and family and most importantly God. Truly appreciate your prayers ppl! THX!!! Another interesting update...Mom got herself a dog, Miki. Guess she was just too lonely huh. haha. That dog could be such a drag. Gosh...A part of the dog's storybook could be found in Esmond's brain, if you are really that desperate to know...ask ME. LOL.
Can't really think of anything to update at the moment. Will do once i think of something again. hee. Gtg for class now, STAY TUNED....(To Be Continued).
*p.s~BILYSSSM!!! M! =)
and talking bout time passing by quickly, it just occured to me that, as each second that passes by, i or in other words everyone, is not growing any younger. As each second passs by, we are growing a second older, a minute older, an hour, a day older, a week older, a month older, a fortnight older, a year older, a century older, a millenium older...ok i was crapping. Point is, we thihnk we have time and chance to do things at a later time in our lives, well sory to tell you, you're wrong...WRONGGGGGG. Time is never on our side, if you wanna do something, you better do it quickly. If you are afraid of doing something or uncertain, either you skip that thought or you don't do it at all. Simple right =P.
OK. Enough of that time goes by quickly part. I will let you ppl decide what to agree to. Either you're with me or you're with Madonna. =)
I will now write what my title says i will write which is what i wrote on my title bar...er...ok. As of today (8 December 2009), I am alive and well (DUH). Well, its already week 8 in my sem. Things are not getting any easier, nor is my time being more UNoccupied. Many ppl who were in short sem, including my bro, have already finish their sem and will be facing their finals next week. All the best everyone!!! =) The force(God) is with you. *their sem break will be one whole month~~NO FAIR!!! =( *
I am already becoming a cute little panda as each day passes by. =) Gosh~~Lord i really need You. "For the JOY of the LORD is my STRENGTH" Yay!!! Joy cell GO!!! =) OK. Nvrmind. I was talking to myself.
So...i am getting busier and i am really starting to treasure those presious time with my friends and family and most importantly God. Truly appreciate your prayers ppl! THX!!! Another interesting update...Mom got herself a dog, Miki. Guess she was just too lonely huh. haha. That dog could be such a drag. Gosh...A part of the dog's storybook could be found in Esmond's brain, if you are really that desperate to know...ask ME. LOL.
Can't really think of anything to update at the moment. Will do once i think of something again. hee. Gtg for class now, STAY TUNED....(To Be Continued).
*p.s~BILYSSSM!!! M! =)
Saturday, November 21, 2009
I need to change!!!
Dear God Almighty,
Why am i writing this out in my blog? Is there something You want to tell others through me? I just felt that I had to write, or in other words type his out here. First and foremost, i just want to thank You God for everything in my life, everything You have blessed me with. Wonderful friends, wonderful parents and siblings, a very very good growing environment(compared to other people), material things, and most importantly the chance to get to know such a wonderful God like You.
Many times i wonder, those people who loves You so much and serves You with all their heart, since they're filled with You in their lives, does that mean that they never get sad or discouraged? Cause if they do, then does that counter the statement that all christians are always filled with joy and should show everyone how joyful they are to have You in their lives?
Once again, looking into the bible, I found that even David, the man after God's heart, sin and even go through time of sorrow and sadness. What is the purpose of this? What i have experienced is, God wants us to go through these things because these are the times we draw close to God and these are the times God has a chance to be really close to us. Smetimes we're so busy we even forgotten God's existence. Can this also be some sort of a test from God for us? Maybe. Maybe it is time for us to grow in the Lord. We can't be babies forever right. We have to grow from being a baby to becoming a worrior of God.
Many people take things for granted. Myself included. Lets not talk about other and just use me as an example. There are many things i take for granted. For example my time, my talents, my material things, and even God. Talents are gifts from God. If i take them for granted, they could be taken away as easily as it is gifted unto me. I must change. I must stop this attitude of taking things for granted. Help me Lord.
As i look at people around me. The things they do. The sins they commit without even thinking twice, my heart really hurts at the sight of those things. God died on the cross for us, for our sins. Sometimes, we take His forgiveness for granted. We say,"I do this,then after that ask for forgiveness lo,God sure forgive me wan", little did we know that each time we sin, we are nailing Him on the cross once again.
Just imagine this, He beared our sins for us. Just imagine that each one of our sins is one strike of the whip, the whip that tore Jesus's skin apart. Yes, He will definetly forgive you,but don't forget that at the same time when you sin that you're hurting Him again, nailing Him on the cross again. I dont want that. I don't want Him to suffer anymore. Many that don't know Christ sin without even knowing it. So for those of us who know when we're sinning, why don't we just stop it!? I know its impossible not to sin because all of us are humans, but i sure all of us can at least reduce it?
I can guarantee that not sinning won't make you feel worse, it will make you feel better...much much better. I've tried, why not you? I think the most important thing is to spend time with God. Once you do so, everything will fall into place. I'm not saying that is you spend time with God you won't sin la, but at least if you do so consistently, you will realise that you will be guided by the Holy Spirit, which by then should be one of your true friends.
If you feel like you've just went through a lecture, forgive me ^.^
Just want to end this post with a prayer.
Lord Jesus, Thank You Lord for waking me up today, for gifting me with another day in this world. I want to pray Lord that You will continue to reveal my purpose in life. Even right now, i want to pray for those who are facing exams, whether it is spm or stpm or even exam in their unis or colleges, whether it is this month or the next. Just pray that You will be with them Lord, leading them and guiding them all the way. When they feel nervous, i pray that You will instill peace in their hearts Lord. Let them know that You're right beside them Lord. If God is for us, who can be against us?
Lord i pray that if we have sinned against You or have taken You for granted, i pray that You'll forgive us Lord. Pray that all my friends will continue to grow in You, that they will know that You have a plan for them, a plan to prosper them and not to harm them, a plan to give them a hope and a future. You love us so much Lord, and i love You too Lord. True love contains no fear. I pray that You will teach me to have no fear of others that speak bad about You Lord. I pray that i will be able to stand up to those who abuse You and Your name.
I admit that i am weak Lord. Strengthen me Lord. Let the weak say i am strong, let the poor say i am rich, let the blind say i can see, thats what the Lord has done in me. =) All this i pray in Jesus name, Amen.
Why am i writing this out in my blog? Is there something You want to tell others through me? I just felt that I had to write, or in other words type his out here. First and foremost, i just want to thank You God for everything in my life, everything You have blessed me with. Wonderful friends, wonderful parents and siblings, a very very good growing environment(compared to other people), material things, and most importantly the chance to get to know such a wonderful God like You.
Many times i wonder, those people who loves You so much and serves You with all their heart, since they're filled with You in their lives, does that mean that they never get sad or discouraged? Cause if they do, then does that counter the statement that all christians are always filled with joy and should show everyone how joyful they are to have You in their lives?
Once again, looking into the bible, I found that even David, the man after God's heart, sin and even go through time of sorrow and sadness. What is the purpose of this? What i have experienced is, God wants us to go through these things because these are the times we draw close to God and these are the times God has a chance to be really close to us. Smetimes we're so busy we even forgotten God's existence. Can this also be some sort of a test from God for us? Maybe. Maybe it is time for us to grow in the Lord. We can't be babies forever right. We have to grow from being a baby to becoming a worrior of God.
Many people take things for granted. Myself included. Lets not talk about other and just use me as an example. There are many things i take for granted. For example my time, my talents, my material things, and even God. Talents are gifts from God. If i take them for granted, they could be taken away as easily as it is gifted unto me. I must change. I must stop this attitude of taking things for granted. Help me Lord.
As i look at people around me. The things they do. The sins they commit without even thinking twice, my heart really hurts at the sight of those things. God died on the cross for us, for our sins. Sometimes, we take His forgiveness for granted. We say,"I do this,then after that ask for forgiveness lo,God sure forgive me wan", little did we know that each time we sin, we are nailing Him on the cross once again.
Just imagine this, He beared our sins for us. Just imagine that each one of our sins is one strike of the whip, the whip that tore Jesus's skin apart. Yes, He will definetly forgive you,but don't forget that at the same time when you sin that you're hurting Him again, nailing Him on the cross again. I dont want that. I don't want Him to suffer anymore. Many that don't know Christ sin without even knowing it. So for those of us who know when we're sinning, why don't we just stop it!? I know its impossible not to sin because all of us are humans, but i sure all of us can at least reduce it?
I can guarantee that not sinning won't make you feel worse, it will make you feel better...much much better. I've tried, why not you? I think the most important thing is to spend time with God. Once you do so, everything will fall into place. I'm not saying that is you spend time with God you won't sin la, but at least if you do so consistently, you will realise that you will be guided by the Holy Spirit, which by then should be one of your true friends.
If you feel like you've just went through a lecture, forgive me ^.^
Just want to end this post with a prayer.
Lord Jesus, Thank You Lord for waking me up today, for gifting me with another day in this world. I want to pray Lord that You will continue to reveal my purpose in life. Even right now, i want to pray for those who are facing exams, whether it is spm or stpm or even exam in their unis or colleges, whether it is this month or the next. Just pray that You will be with them Lord, leading them and guiding them all the way. When they feel nervous, i pray that You will instill peace in their hearts Lord. Let them know that You're right beside them Lord. If God is for us, who can be against us?
Lord i pray that if we have sinned against You or have taken You for granted, i pray that You'll forgive us Lord. Pray that all my friends will continue to grow in You, that they will know that You have a plan for them, a plan to prosper them and not to harm them, a plan to give them a hope and a future. You love us so much Lord, and i love You too Lord. True love contains no fear. I pray that You will teach me to have no fear of others that speak bad about You Lord. I pray that i will be able to stand up to those who abuse You and Your name.
I admit that i am weak Lord. Strengthen me Lord. Let the weak say i am strong, let the poor say i am rich, let the blind say i can see, thats what the Lord has done in me. =) All this i pray in Jesus name, Amen.
Beautiful One - Tim Hughes
Wonderful, so wonderful
Is Your unfailing love
Your cross has spoken mercy over me
No eye has seen, no ear has heardNo heart could fully know
How glorious, how beautiful you are!
Beautiful One I love You
Beautiful One I adore
Beautiful One my soul must sing
Powerful, so powerful
Your glory fills the skies
Your mighty works displayed for all to see
The beauty of Your majesty
Awakes my heart to sing
How marvellous, how wonderful You are
You opened my eyes to Your wonders anew
You captured my heart with this love
Because nothing on earth is as beautiful as You
My soul, my soul must sing
My soul, my soul must sing
My soul, my soul must sing
Beautiful One
Is Your unfailing love
Your cross has spoken mercy over me
No eye has seen, no ear has heardNo heart could fully know
How glorious, how beautiful you are!
Beautiful One I love You
Beautiful One I adore
Beautiful One my soul must sing
Powerful, so powerful
Your glory fills the skies
Your mighty works displayed for all to see
The beauty of Your majesty
Awakes my heart to sing
How marvellous, how wonderful You are
You opened my eyes to Your wonders anew
You captured my heart with this love
Because nothing on earth is as beautiful as You
My soul, my soul must sing
My soul, my soul must sing
My soul, my soul must sing
Beautiful One
Holy Is The Lord-Chris Tomlin
We stand and lift up our hands
For the joy of the Lord is our strength
We bow down and worship Him now
How great, how awesome is He
And together we sing
Everyone sing
[Chorus]
Holy is the Lord God Almighty
The earth is filled with His glory
Holy is the Lord God Almighty
The earth is filled with His glory
The earth is filled with His glory
It's rising up all aroundI
t's the anthem of the Lord's renown
Repeat
And together we sing,Everyone sing
For the joy of the Lord is our strength
We bow down and worship Him now
How great, how awesome is He
And together we sing
Everyone sing
[Chorus]
Holy is the Lord God Almighty
The earth is filled with His glory
Holy is the Lord God Almighty
The earth is filled with His glory
The earth is filled with His glory
It's rising up all aroundI
t's the anthem of the Lord's renown
Repeat
And together we sing,Everyone sing
Saturday, November 14, 2009
A new beginning
Here we are again. The start of a new semester. New hopes,new dreams,new friends,new environment,new lecturers,new swt ppl,new stories,new goals...but unfortunately...no new handphone,new car,new laptop,new clothes,new underwear....ok, scrap the underwear. Keke.
The fact is, its already week 4 of the new semester. LOL right? Haha. The hope of those new material things is most probably just a dream, as usual i was just crapping =D Well, hope those new dreams and goals won't turn into ashes by the end of this sem. I must really start working hard and stop getting tempted too much. Maybe i should stop blogging right now? Hehe...
Hmmm...(thinking to myself:should i continue?)...Oh well, i shall not prevail. HAHA. So whats the decision?
Apple. Continue
Banana. Come back to this later
Coconut. STOP NOW!!!
Durian. Forget about this whole post
Well, if u know me well enough, i don't fancy banana and i don't like durian so B and D is out. So remains A and C. Honestly, i prefer apple to coconut. So...
Lets continue. HAHA.
As i have said, its already the 4th week of the new semester(guess its not so new d huh). For most people, its already halfway pass their sem. For me, the lucky one(or not so lucky?),i'm going through long sem. Time seems to pass so so so so so so so so quickly this sem. I don't know why. One blink of an eye and its already week 4. And the thing that worries me is that neither me nor any of my group members have started the assignment. Well, we did start a tiny weeny bit la. But honestly, its nothing.
The new so called system of allowing you to choose your own timetable or time slot is...what shall i say...i think...its kinda good la. Get to know new friends and so on. But the thing is, its taking too darn long. First week, no new friends. Second week, form assignment group members, but don't know each other=NO NEW FRIENDS. And its not like i join my friends from the first sem thats why i didn't make new friends, its because of 5 words:YOU TALK ONI I TALK.
So, the epic story continues. 3rd week, made a few new friends la, have to ma, do assignment. At the end of this week, which is the 4th week, in total i've made...lets see...7...new friends. All which are hi bye friends only. Never really like sitting down together talking and crapping and laughing. The other thing is, i think my name is too nice to pronounce. Friends keep calling me "ESMOND!!!", and when i respond "YES?"...they or he/she will say "nothing le" or "jiao shuang"(calling just for fun,for no apparent reason) and i will be like =.=''' .
Well, hope to know those friends better. Still trying to find a good and true friend in utar though. Still praying about it. =) I'm sure God will provide. As i observe the people around me, i realised they are not as they seem. I saw a guy and thought he was quite a good fellow. Good in conversing, dresses well, well mannered. But when i saw him on another occasion, it was a totally different story.
I was walking, minding my own business(as usual), when i saw him with a group of friends. and THEN HE SAID IT. "F*** lah!!! MA C** B**!!!" I was looking at him from an angle thinking "what did you just say?!" I was stunned. After that occasion, i continue observing and realised that many other people were also like that. GOSH~~~ Hope i'm not 1 of them. Although i must admit i do say foul words unintentionally, ya, sometimes its kinda automatic. I try my best to not say those things and keep myself in check though. Still keeping myself in check daily.
These things just prove that people are unpredictable. GOSH, the things you see them do when they're "high", they're just not themselves!!! SCARY MAN~~~And to those who misuse God's and Jesus's name in vain, Lord, i pray that you'll forgive them, for they know not what they do.
God has been continually blessing me since the start of the new semester. THANK YOU GOD!!! Have been listening to the song Thank You Lord by Don Moen. Meaningful. Once again, THANK YOU LORD!!! Hehe...signing off for now.
trying my best to put God first!!!, ezmen =)
The fact is, its already week 4 of the new semester. LOL right? Haha. The hope of those new material things is most probably just a dream, as usual i was just crapping =D Well, hope those new dreams and goals won't turn into ashes by the end of this sem. I must really start working hard and stop getting tempted too much. Maybe i should stop blogging right now? Hehe...
Hmmm...(thinking to myself:should i continue?)...Oh well, i shall not prevail. HAHA. So whats the decision?
Apple. Continue
Banana. Come back to this later
Coconut. STOP NOW!!!
Durian. Forget about this whole post
Well, if u know me well enough, i don't fancy banana and i don't like durian so B and D is out. So remains A and C. Honestly, i prefer apple to coconut. So...
Lets continue. HAHA.
As i have said, its already the 4th week of the new semester(guess its not so new d huh). For most people, its already halfway pass their sem. For me, the lucky one(or not so lucky?),i'm going through long sem. Time seems to pass so so so so so so so so quickly this sem. I don't know why. One blink of an eye and its already week 4. And the thing that worries me is that neither me nor any of my group members have started the assignment. Well, we did start a tiny weeny bit la. But honestly, its nothing.
The new so called system of allowing you to choose your own timetable or time slot is...what shall i say...i think...its kinda good la. Get to know new friends and so on. But the thing is, its taking too darn long. First week, no new friends. Second week, form assignment group members, but don't know each other=NO NEW FRIENDS. And its not like i join my friends from the first sem thats why i didn't make new friends, its because of 5 words:YOU TALK ONI I TALK.
So, the epic story continues. 3rd week, made a few new friends la, have to ma, do assignment. At the end of this week, which is the 4th week, in total i've made...lets see...7...new friends. All which are hi bye friends only. Never really like sitting down together talking and crapping and laughing. The other thing is, i think my name is too nice to pronounce. Friends keep calling me "ESMOND!!!", and when i respond "YES?"...they or he/she will say "nothing le" or "jiao shuang"(calling just for fun,for no apparent reason) and i will be like =.=''' .
Well, hope to know those friends better. Still trying to find a good and true friend in utar though. Still praying about it. =) I'm sure God will provide. As i observe the people around me, i realised they are not as they seem. I saw a guy and thought he was quite a good fellow. Good in conversing, dresses well, well mannered. But when i saw him on another occasion, it was a totally different story.
I was walking, minding my own business(as usual), when i saw him with a group of friends. and THEN HE SAID IT. "F*** lah!!! MA C** B**!!!" I was looking at him from an angle thinking "what did you just say?!" I was stunned. After that occasion, i continue observing and realised that many other people were also like that. GOSH~~~ Hope i'm not 1 of them. Although i must admit i do say foul words unintentionally, ya, sometimes its kinda automatic. I try my best to not say those things and keep myself in check though. Still keeping myself in check daily.
These things just prove that people are unpredictable. GOSH, the things you see them do when they're "high", they're just not themselves!!! SCARY MAN~~~And to those who misuse God's and Jesus's name in vain, Lord, i pray that you'll forgive them, for they know not what they do.
God has been continually blessing me since the start of the new semester. THANK YOU GOD!!! Have been listening to the song Thank You Lord by Don Moen. Meaningful. Once again, THANK YOU LORD!!! Hehe...signing off for now.
trying my best to put God first!!!, ezmen =)
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Tim Hughes-Everything
God in my living There in my breathing
God in my waking God in my sleeping
God in my resting There in my working
God in my thinking God in my speaking
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
God in my hoping There in my dreaming
God in my watching God in my waiting
God in my laughing There in my weeping
God in my hurting God in my healing
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
You are everything
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
Be my everything
God in my waking God in my sleeping
God in my resting There in my working
God in my thinking God in my speaking
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
God in my hoping There in my dreaming
God in my watching God in my waiting
God in my laughing There in my weeping
God in my hurting God in my healing
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
You are everything
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
Be my everything
Reality check
I want to begin with an apology for my little bloggie for not feeding it for some while. =) Sorry bloggie. On many occasions i had the urgency to "feed" my blog but in the end when i sit down, the mood was just gone with the wind. The spirit was willing but the flesh was weak.
The month of October has really been a great month for me. If others were in my shoes, they might put it as the worst month of the year, but i want to look at it in a positive way. The month of October has really hit me hard, pulling me back to reality.
The bad things that happened drowned the good things, and i must say this...I THANK GOD IT HAPPENED!!! Firstly, it started with me getting a not so good results in my finals for my first sem. I didn't cry or anything, but those result really affected me, and i know no one else is to blame but me. I nearly couldn't get an A for my english language. If i really didn't get an A, the chances of me going home to see my parents we...nil. OK...maybe i'm going overboard.
Then came the interesting bad thing. Within a time period of 1week+, 3 friends told me i have changed, that i had bad behaviours. I was like...ok... When i asked them what is that specific bad behaviour, they didn't want tot tell me. All they said was you should know la. I was like swt... As a friend why not just tell me what i did wrong so that i can change? One of their reply was quite meaningless. One of them said, "if i told you what it is, i'm afraid i won't be able to face you as a friend anymore."
I was thinking like "WAT!?!" , so you want to keep it in your heart and hate me your whole life? I rather you tell me and not be friends with me. At least i noe what i did wrong and change, and at least they don't need to become friends with a friend like me. I deserve it anyway. Gosh,i feel so much like putting a foul word in front of the word FRIEND in the previous sentense.
I kept thinking about what i did, but just couldn't think of anything that i did that could cause such hatred. I guess i either did it unconciously, or i was blinded by my ego. To all my friends out there, if i have hurt you in the past in any way possible, I'M SO SORRY. I guess writing it here doesn't shown sincerity at all right, and its kinda useless. OK. If i have hurt any of you, pls let me know, i will come to you personally and say sorry. Its from my heart.
I love all my friends and i would never want to hurt them. Guess i was wrong, i already did pierce through a few hearts. I guess what was written in the bible is right. The tongue is such a powerful tool. It can be used for good and evil. On both occasions, it has great effect. Its proven, through me.
Through this tough time i have learnt to withdraw and seek God. I am so happy and filled with joy when i am in the presense of my Lord. =) I want to change to who God wants me to be. It will be a process, but i'll just have to slowly go through it. Hopefully next time when they said that i've changed, it would be for the better. =)
I've decided to commit myself to putting God first in my life, and i want to challenge everyone to do the same too. I know its hard, but its better than not trying. God is patient, he will always be waiting for you. Let worshipping and praising God be not just a Saturday and Sunday thingi, but instead let it be a daily thing till the last breath. Just want to thank all my friends for keeping me in prayer. THANK YOU GOD FOR EVERYTHING!!! Be my everything. =)
The month of October has really been a great month for me. If others were in my shoes, they might put it as the worst month of the year, but i want to look at it in a positive way. The month of October has really hit me hard, pulling me back to reality.
The bad things that happened drowned the good things, and i must say this...I THANK GOD IT HAPPENED!!! Firstly, it started with me getting a not so good results in my finals for my first sem. I didn't cry or anything, but those result really affected me, and i know no one else is to blame but me. I nearly couldn't get an A for my english language. If i really didn't get an A, the chances of me going home to see my parents we...nil. OK...maybe i'm going overboard.
Then came the interesting bad thing. Within a time period of 1week+, 3 friends told me i have changed, that i had bad behaviours. I was like...ok... When i asked them what is that specific bad behaviour, they didn't want tot tell me. All they said was you should know la. I was like swt... As a friend why not just tell me what i did wrong so that i can change? One of their reply was quite meaningless. One of them said, "if i told you what it is, i'm afraid i won't be able to face you as a friend anymore."
I was thinking like "WAT!?!" , so you want to keep it in your heart and hate me your whole life? I rather you tell me and not be friends with me. At least i noe what i did wrong and change, and at least they don't need to become friends with a friend like me. I deserve it anyway. Gosh,i feel so much like putting a foul word in front of the word FRIEND in the previous sentense.
I kept thinking about what i did, but just couldn't think of anything that i did that could cause such hatred. I guess i either did it unconciously, or i was blinded by my ego. To all my friends out there, if i have hurt you in the past in any way possible, I'M SO SORRY. I guess writing it here doesn't shown sincerity at all right, and its kinda useless. OK. If i have hurt any of you, pls let me know, i will come to you personally and say sorry. Its from my heart.
I love all my friends and i would never want to hurt them. Guess i was wrong, i already did pierce through a few hearts. I guess what was written in the bible is right. The tongue is such a powerful tool. It can be used for good and evil. On both occasions, it has great effect. Its proven, through me.
Through this tough time i have learnt to withdraw and seek God. I am so happy and filled with joy when i am in the presense of my Lord. =) I want to change to who God wants me to be. It will be a process, but i'll just have to slowly go through it. Hopefully next time when they said that i've changed, it would be for the better. =)
I've decided to commit myself to putting God first in my life, and i want to challenge everyone to do the same too. I know its hard, but its better than not trying. God is patient, he will always be waiting for you. Let worshipping and praising God be not just a Saturday and Sunday thingi, but instead let it be a daily thing till the last breath. Just want to thank all my friends for keeping me in prayer. THANK YOU GOD FOR EVERYTHING!!! Be my everything. =)
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
A wonderful week =)
Well, as promised, my blog has been revived. =) Many things happened throughout the past week. I will bring you through each even in...lets say..."quite detail"...well, i will make it as detailed as possible.
26 Sept 2009
Finals were finally over. Everyone(me in particular), breathe a huge *SIGH* of relief. The only thoughts going through everyone's minds is how to spend/enjoy their holidays. I didn't have to plan much as some things had already been planned out for me.
And so some boring days passed...
30 Sept 2009
My birthday. Surprisingly many ppl wished me happy birthday. Total count was around 15+- ppl. I know for some ppl its not really that many but for me, its more than i ever had on my birthday since the day i was born. Hehe... I was touched by all those wishes. Thankz everyone!!! Well, the camp fell on the same day as my birthday. They planned a surprise for me. Well, it was my brothers idea (thx so much bro...muax), but it wasn't him who bought the cake (LOL...jk jk). OK...i blushed when they gave me the surprise, but i didn't get to eat any of the cake cause i was too full...hehe...Missed HER so much...
Well, the camp was a 3 days 2 nights camp and i must say, it really tested me and streched me both physically and mentally. I really enjoyed the camp. =) Thank You God!!!
4 Oct 2009
Woke up early in the morning. Served my God by playing for the first and second service =). Was treated pizza by church members (thanks everyone!)...At some point...i feel like i don't deserve any of these things. Who am i? I just a normal person. I just feel so blessed having so many friends around me, what more having them to treat me to such an expensive meal? Went to burn those calories of at X-treme park.
Thank you God for such a wonderful week. =). Well, last but not least, i got sick yesterday (6 Oct 2009). It was like fever+stomach ache. Rested for almost the whole day, think i slept for bout more than 12 hours (excluding normal sleeping time). Felt so much better after hours of rest. Kitty and HER visited me too. =) Guess that was part of the reason i felt better...hehe...
As of right now (7 Oct 2009), i'm free from the fever and feel much better. Thanks everyone for all your prayers. Appreciate it lots!!!
26 Sept 2009
Finals were finally over. Everyone(me in particular), breathe a huge *SIGH* of relief. The only thoughts going through everyone's minds is how to spend/enjoy their holidays. I didn't have to plan much as some things had already been planned out for me.
And so some boring days passed...
30 Sept 2009
My birthday. Surprisingly many ppl wished me happy birthday. Total count was around 15+- ppl. I know for some ppl its not really that many but for me, its more than i ever had on my birthday since the day i was born. Hehe... I was touched by all those wishes. Thankz everyone!!! Well, the camp fell on the same day as my birthday. They planned a surprise for me. Well, it was my brothers idea (thx so much bro...muax), but it wasn't him who bought the cake (LOL...jk jk). OK...i blushed when they gave me the surprise, but i didn't get to eat any of the cake cause i was too full...hehe...Missed HER so much...
Well, the camp was a 3 days 2 nights camp and i must say, it really tested me and streched me both physically and mentally. I really enjoyed the camp. =) Thank You God!!!
4 Oct 2009
Woke up early in the morning. Served my God by playing for the first and second service =). Was treated pizza by church members (thanks everyone!)...At some point...i feel like i don't deserve any of these things. Who am i? I just a normal person. I just feel so blessed having so many friends around me, what more having them to treat me to such an expensive meal? Went to burn those calories of at X-treme park.
Thank you God for such a wonderful week. =). Well, last but not least, i got sick yesterday (6 Oct 2009). It was like fever+stomach ache. Rested for almost the whole day, think i slept for bout more than 12 hours (excluding normal sleeping time). Felt so much better after hours of rest. Kitty and HER visited me too. =) Guess that was part of the reason i felt better...hehe...
As of right now (7 Oct 2009), i'm free from the fever and feel much better. Thanks everyone for all your prayers. Appreciate it lots!!!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Timeout =(
Don't think i will be blogging much for the rest of this month. Blogging will probably resume next month. I'm sure of it. All the best to everyone who are having exams. All glory to God!!!
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
i need u Lord
This month is going to be a very hectic and busy month. My first finals in utar is going to begin this Friday (11 Sept 2009). Studies hasn't been going really well. Still trying to catch up on what i've missed out. And then after finals will be the campus connect camp. Don't know if i should feel exited or anxious even at this point of time.
Woke up at about 10+-a.m today,and still haven't begin today's study yet. Sigh...still blogging pulak. Think its cause of this tingy feeling that my blog hasn't been updated for quite some time that i feel obliged to update it. Hehe... Well, i know that many of my friends are studying very hard, although they claim not to be studying at all (LOSERS!!!).
Don't really know their reason of acting that way. Is it because they're humble? or is it because they want to be proud once they get their results? No idea. Well, i think this answer is almost the same for everyone. Even if u ask me, i will say i didn't study, but to a certain extent i actually did la. I think the reason most people say they didn't study is because we ourselves feel we didn't study enough for that particular test/examination. Its kind of a Malaysian thingi i guess.
Finding it hard to focus while studying nowadays. Dunno why le... I really need your help Lord. I know many people are praying for me. =) I will do my best!!!. Well, what am i still waiting for? Guess thats all for todays news. Tata for now!
Woke up at about 10+-a.m today,and still haven't begin today's study yet. Sigh...still blogging pulak. Think its cause of this tingy feeling that my blog hasn't been updated for quite some time that i feel obliged to update it. Hehe... Well, i know that many of my friends are studying very hard, although they claim not to be studying at all (LOSERS!!!).
Don't really know their reason of acting that way. Is it because they're humble? or is it because they want to be proud once they get their results? No idea. Well, i think this answer is almost the same for everyone. Even if u ask me, i will say i didn't study, but to a certain extent i actually did la. I think the reason most people say they didn't study is because we ourselves feel we didn't study enough for that particular test/examination. Its kind of a Malaysian thingi i guess.
Finding it hard to focus while studying nowadays. Dunno why le... I really need your help Lord. I know many people are praying for me. =) I will do my best!!!. Well, what am i still waiting for? Guess thats all for todays news. Tata for now!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Boring but yet fruitful weekend =)
Last weekend i didn't plan to go back to Ipoh because most of my friends were in family camp and there was also no youth and 3rd service. But in the end i still went back after my father persuaded me to go back. The reason he gave for wanting me to go back is so that at least someone is at home, or in other words at least someone is at home with him. =) Although he didn't force me to go back, i still went back anyway, knowing that at least i can be there with him during the weekends since he only comes back during the weekends after a hectic working week.
So there i was, driving back to Ipoh on Friday from Kampar (my first time by the way), wasn't really nervous (dunno why), or anything...hmmm...maybe its because i prayed before starting the journey? Driving was known to be in the Goh family's genes anyway. My dad is a pro driver, can't say the same about my bro and sis though, they're close...but they're more of verging to the "crazy driver" category...keke...but they're good la, honest.
Me le, normal lo. I think i haven't unleash my true potential yet...keke. But anyway driving fast is never good (aside form getting you to a place a LITTLE earlier), so to all drivers, if you're REALLY not rushing, please be careful and don't speed.
Arriving home, i was wondering what i was going to do for the next two days and in the end, it ended up quite well. I managed to spend some much sought after time with my God, not forgetting going to the movies to watch G.I.JOE with my dad. Guess he knew i was bored anyway. => The movie was...well...interesting, quite good actually, considering many of those things are actually more possible than someone extending steel claws slashing people for fun.
I missed HER so much during the weekends, but on Sunday, seeing some of my friends in church, my mood kinda lifted up. I love all my friends, whether its in church or in uni. Being able to see them, makes me smile. =) God also reminded me that many of my friends and cell leaders have been praying for me while i was going through a bad patch just last week.
THANK YOU EVRYONE FOR YOUR PRAYERS!!! =)
Recently many of my friends are facing different kinds of problems. I've been hearing and seeing so much. I don't want my friends to be sad. If any of my friends have any problems, i'll always be there to lend a listening ear or even a helping hand. But if any of them don't want their problems to be known, i won't force them to tell either. What i'll be doing is PRAYING!
PRAYING is the easiest and most effective way to help my friends. It has done wonders for me (thanks to my wondeful God =) ) and i'm sure my prayers for my friends will be heard by God too. =)
THANK YOU GOD FOR HEALING ME AND I PRAY THAT MY FRIENDS WILL BE HEALED AND THAT THEY WILL BE ABLE TO EXPERIENCE YOU TOO! THANK YOU GOD! LOVE YOU...MUACKS =)
So there i was, driving back to Ipoh on Friday from Kampar (my first time by the way), wasn't really nervous (dunno why), or anything...hmmm...maybe its because i prayed before starting the journey? Driving was known to be in the Goh family's genes anyway. My dad is a pro driver, can't say the same about my bro and sis though, they're close...but they're more of verging to the "crazy driver" category...keke...but they're good la, honest.
Me le, normal lo. I think i haven't unleash my true potential yet...keke. But anyway driving fast is never good (aside form getting you to a place a LITTLE earlier), so to all drivers, if you're REALLY not rushing, please be careful and don't speed.
Arriving home, i was wondering what i was going to do for the next two days and in the end, it ended up quite well. I managed to spend some much sought after time with my God, not forgetting going to the movies to watch G.I.JOE with my dad. Guess he knew i was bored anyway. => The movie was...well...interesting, quite good actually, considering many of those things are actually more possible than someone extending steel claws slashing people for fun.
I missed HER so much during the weekends, but on Sunday, seeing some of my friends in church, my mood kinda lifted up. I love all my friends, whether its in church or in uni. Being able to see them, makes me smile. =) God also reminded me that many of my friends and cell leaders have been praying for me while i was going through a bad patch just last week.
THANK YOU EVRYONE FOR YOUR PRAYERS!!! =)
Recently many of my friends are facing different kinds of problems. I've been hearing and seeing so much. I don't want my friends to be sad. If any of my friends have any problems, i'll always be there to lend a listening ear or even a helping hand. But if any of them don't want their problems to be known, i won't force them to tell either. What i'll be doing is PRAYING!
PRAYING is the easiest and most effective way to help my friends. It has done wonders for me (thanks to my wondeful God =) ) and i'm sure my prayers for my friends will be heard by God too. =)
THANK YOU GOD FOR HEALING ME AND I PRAY THAT MY FRIENDS WILL BE HEALED AND THAT THEY WILL BE ABLE TO EXPERIENCE YOU TOO! THANK YOU GOD! LOVE YOU...MUACKS =)
Saturday, August 22, 2009
SORRY SORRY
This is a MV from a korean group named SUPER JUNIOR (or is it?) consisting of wat...10+- guys? Quite a nice MV. Although I don't know korean, I was kinda attracted to its rhythem and tempo, and quite a good choreography. At some point it sounded like an indian song...lol...and some of them look gay in the vid... XD! Hope you like it! =)
*p.s: wonder hw many sorry(s) they actually said...keke...hope they're not actually singing anything pervert or foul language...oops...
hint: for clear hearing, its best you pause my autoplay song first though. Sorry for the inconvinience. =)
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
A sad week
Even as i'm typing this...The words that can come to my mind about what i'm feeling right now:-
1) sad
2) down
3) moody
4) emo
5) depressed
I don't know why i'm feeling like this. Ever since end of last week, these feelings hv been growing inside me. This feelings we made worse by the things i saw, things i heard, and things i observed...adding to the fact that my cell leader wasn't back during the weekend. I guess i really needed someone to listen to my problems, to just lend a ear. But yet in my heart i told myself i was not going to make someone waste their time listening to me. So i kept it inside.
Seeking for an alternative, i naturally thought of seeking God. I prayed, at times almost at the brink of crying but i held back my tears. When i think of everything, i just...felt so tired and fed up of everything. I just want to pour it out to God. SHE tried to comfort me, and it actually worked...but a few days after that i was back to this unexplainable feeling again.
I don't know whats wrong with me. Many people say i've changed. When i come to think of it, i think i've changed for the worse and not for the better. I've hurt so many peoples feelings unknowingly. I've been left out from my group of friends. Most of my kampar friends stay in west lake while i'm staying in east lake. Hearing their stories of them having fun the day before, sometimes make me envy them, wishing i could stay at west lake too. But the rental there prove too expensive.
They will be chatting with each other about what happened and i'll just be sitting there quietly listening, wishing i could be part of the conversation too. I don''t actually feel bad being left out, because i think that having God in my life beats being left out. Nowadays in uni i'll be alone most of the time because my so called good friends have made new friends and they do many activities together in westlake, so they more or less stick together with each other more often now.
I feel happy for them. (or do i?) The times when i'm alone, i would spend this time talking to God and just sort of entertain myself. I like being alone sometimes. But being alone sometimes also make me think of many things. There are quite a number of people i would like to say sorry to right now. I'm just so messed up, so confused. I don't know what to think right now. I don't even know if i'm typing sense. So to those who are reading this and don't understand where its getting to, i'm sorry. Even i don't know where i'm getting at.
Among my ipoh friends, to a certrain degree i do feel left out too. I don't know why. Maybe because i didn't go to form 6 and thus don't really have the same wavelengths with my friends who are in form 6. Or maybe its just because of the fact that i've came to kampar to study that i feel different. i feel like i'm in the way when a group of them are talking together.
At times i feel like being left alone but yet i don't want to be left alone. Something's missing, or in other words too many things are in my mind. Things that i just can't let go of. I really need God right now.
There are many more things i want to express. But i think this amount of crap is enough for today. I know things will clear up soon. =) TQ GOD
Tired, messed up & confused,
Esmond...
1) sad
2) down
3) moody
4) emo
5) depressed
I don't know why i'm feeling like this. Ever since end of last week, these feelings hv been growing inside me. This feelings we made worse by the things i saw, things i heard, and things i observed...adding to the fact that my cell leader wasn't back during the weekend. I guess i really needed someone to listen to my problems, to just lend a ear. But yet in my heart i told myself i was not going to make someone waste their time listening to me. So i kept it inside.
Seeking for an alternative, i naturally thought of seeking God. I prayed, at times almost at the brink of crying but i held back my tears. When i think of everything, i just...felt so tired and fed up of everything. I just want to pour it out to God. SHE tried to comfort me, and it actually worked...but a few days after that i was back to this unexplainable feeling again.
I don't know whats wrong with me. Many people say i've changed. When i come to think of it, i think i've changed for the worse and not for the better. I've hurt so many peoples feelings unknowingly. I've been left out from my group of friends. Most of my kampar friends stay in west lake while i'm staying in east lake. Hearing their stories of them having fun the day before, sometimes make me envy them, wishing i could stay at west lake too. But the rental there prove too expensive.
They will be chatting with each other about what happened and i'll just be sitting there quietly listening, wishing i could be part of the conversation too. I don''t actually feel bad being left out, because i think that having God in my life beats being left out. Nowadays in uni i'll be alone most of the time because my so called good friends have made new friends and they do many activities together in westlake, so they more or less stick together with each other more often now.
I feel happy for them. (or do i?) The times when i'm alone, i would spend this time talking to God and just sort of entertain myself. I like being alone sometimes. But being alone sometimes also make me think of many things. There are quite a number of people i would like to say sorry to right now. I'm just so messed up, so confused. I don't know what to think right now. I don't even know if i'm typing sense. So to those who are reading this and don't understand where its getting to, i'm sorry. Even i don't know where i'm getting at.
Among my ipoh friends, to a certrain degree i do feel left out too. I don't know why. Maybe because i didn't go to form 6 and thus don't really have the same wavelengths with my friends who are in form 6. Or maybe its just because of the fact that i've came to kampar to study that i feel different. i feel like i'm in the way when a group of them are talking together.
At times i feel like being left alone but yet i don't want to be left alone. Something's missing, or in other words too many things are in my mind. Things that i just can't let go of. I really need God right now.
There are many more things i want to express. But i think this amount of crap is enough for today. I know things will clear up soon. =) TQ GOD
Tired, messed up & confused,
Esmond...
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Finally i was able to go online. Wednesday's heavy rain (i don't know how) somehow managed to sort of like destroy all the internet connections. I mean like, when i on the wireless, i can still detect, but when i try to connect, i just wasn't able to connect to the internet.
But today, i think its was God's blessing. When i woke up today, which was at about 9.05.32 a.m. , i didn't even think of starting up my laptop. This is mainly due to the reason that for the past two days my efforts to go online were in vain. I was like "oh, crap!". Well, i don't really know what made me on my laptop but somehow i did (habit i guess), and when i did actually on it, i was still slumber and blur.
It actually took me about 5 minutes or so to realise that everything (internet connection) was back to normal. I was so exited and quickly started to get busy clicking my pet. Sorry if i clicked u too hard Micky. =)
...was so into facebook (LOL) that i didn't realise how fast time has passed. One look at the clock and it was time for class. For everyones information i actually DID arrive to class late for about 15 mins+- because i thought i had lots of time and forgotten that i actually have to cycle to block B. =( Hate Fridays.
Don't know why le, on fridays, its especially hard to cycle to uni. The sun seems much brighter, the wind i have to cycle against seems more stronger, my legs seem to be weaker, and the other people around me seems to be more blur and dangerous(ARGGGHHH!!!). Hmm...maybe they're suffering from the same thing too...dunno lah.
I find that i like to think and ponder about many things whilst riding my bicycle, whether its to or from uni. Sometimes think of food, play, nonsense, crap, rubbish an mush more BS. Keke... Somehow thinking of these things helps me to realise many things, thing that i missed out throughout the entire day. When i think back, I do seem to be able to remember some details about some things that i didn't actually realise or observe at that point of time (HUH!?). If its something i forgot to do, i might end up regretting the whole half of the day. Not that regretting helps anyway. =)
Well...Oh yeah!!!. I forgot to thank God for this whole week and for everything too!...my presentationS, moodyness, ...etc. TQ God for everything!!! ^.^
But today, i think its was God's blessing. When i woke up today, which was at about 9.05.32 a.m. , i didn't even think of starting up my laptop. This is mainly due to the reason that for the past two days my efforts to go online were in vain. I was like "oh, crap!". Well, i don't really know what made me on my laptop but somehow i did (habit i guess), and when i did actually on it, i was still slumber and blur.
It actually took me about 5 minutes or so to realise that everything (internet connection) was back to normal. I was so exited and quickly started to get busy clicking my pet. Sorry if i clicked u too hard Micky. =)
...was so into facebook (LOL) that i didn't realise how fast time has passed. One look at the clock and it was time for class. For everyones information i actually DID arrive to class late for about 15 mins+- because i thought i had lots of time and forgotten that i actually have to cycle to block B. =( Hate Fridays.
Don't know why le, on fridays, its especially hard to cycle to uni. The sun seems much brighter, the wind i have to cycle against seems more stronger, my legs seem to be weaker, and the other people around me seems to be more blur and dangerous(ARGGGHHH!!!). Hmm...maybe they're suffering from the same thing too...dunno lah.
I find that i like to think and ponder about many things whilst riding my bicycle, whether its to or from uni. Sometimes think of food, play, nonsense, crap, rubbish an mush more BS. Keke... Somehow thinking of these things helps me to realise many things, thing that i missed out throughout the entire day. When i think back, I do seem to be able to remember some details about some things that i didn't actually realise or observe at that point of time (HUH!?). If its something i forgot to do, i might end up regretting the whole half of the day. Not that regretting helps anyway. =)
Well...Oh yeah!!!. I forgot to thank God for this whole week and for everything too!...my presentationS, moodyness, ...etc. TQ God for everything!!! ^.^
Friday, August 14, 2009
Every Man - Casting Crowns (3rd song on my playlist)
I'm the man with all I've ever wanted
All the toys and playing games
I am the one who pours your coffee, corner booth each Saturday
I am your daughter's favorite teacher
I am the leader of the band
I sit behind you in the bleachers
I am every man
I'm the coach of every winning team and still a loser in my mind
I am the soldier in the airport facing giants one more time
I am the woman shamed and haunted by the cry of unborn life
I'm every broken man, nervous child, lonely wife
Is there hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man
Seems there's just so many roads to travel, it's hard to tell where they will lead
My life is scarred and my dreams unraveled
Now I'm scared to take the leap
If I could find someone to follow who knows my pain and feels the weight
The uncertainty of my tomorrow, the guilt and pain of yesterday
Is there hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understandIs there hope for every man
There is hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man
There is Love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?
Jesus is hope for every man
All the toys and playing games
I am the one who pours your coffee, corner booth each Saturday
I am your daughter's favorite teacher
I am the leader of the band
I sit behind you in the bleachers
I am every man
I'm the coach of every winning team and still a loser in my mind
I am the soldier in the airport facing giants one more time
I am the woman shamed and haunted by the cry of unborn life
I'm every broken man, nervous child, lonely wife
Is there hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understand
Is there hope for every man
Seems there's just so many roads to travel, it's hard to tell where they will lead
My life is scarred and my dreams unraveled
Now I'm scared to take the leap
If I could find someone to follow who knows my pain and feels the weight
The uncertainty of my tomorrow, the guilt and pain of yesterday
Is there hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
Is there hope for every man
Is there love that never dies
Is there peace in troubled times
Someone help me understandIs there hope for every man
There is hope for every man
A solid place where we can stand
In this dry and weary land
There is hope for every man
There is Love that never dies
There is peace in troubled times
Will we help them understand?
Jesus is hope for every man
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
2 down, 1 more to go
Did 2 presentations today (10 August 2009), public speaking and computer studies presentation. The day started with me waking up late, mayb due to the overnight work and preparation for the presentation(s). Apparently it wasn't enough. The public speaking presentation, well, it didn't go as well as i wanted it to, but i guess that's what you get when you don't put in enough effort and practice in doing the presentation.
To all my group members, thank you all so much, you guys did your very very best, i'm so proud of all of you. If anyone is to blame, the person would be me. Starting late, insufficient practice and so on was mainly due to the lack of my time management. Not that i'm looking down on myself or whatever, come to think of it, its just ME.
As a group leader, leadership quality MUST be shown, and that was the exact thing that was BLARINGLY lacking. Just ask any of my group members, i'm sure they'll agree with you without a second thought. The sharing out of tasks and responsibilities weren't equal too. No one's to blame for that because its understandable that some have to go back during the weekends.
To all my group members, i'm sorry if things didn't turn out well. It was obvious that we could have done much better with a little more effort, just as said by ms.chuah. Don't feel depressed or sad or down ya. What's past is past. All i can say is that i'm sorry.
p.s: Thank you God so much for helping me and guiding me throughout this whole process of doing the talkshow and computer studies presentation. You have blessed and given me so much. What more could i ask for? What ever results that comes out, i'll just accept it. I know God has helped me plenty, once again its just me...hehe...I get what i deserve i guess. (A lesson learnt)
As for the computer studies presentation, once again, thank you everyone for their efforts in doing the report and poster. Everyone chipped in. The credit belongs to everyone. Me as the leader, have to say that i'm surprised on the cooperation gave by all of you (group members).
Even right now, before i go to bed, all i want to do is just place everything at God's feet, and rest in His arms. Next week is econs presentation. Better bark up. =) TQ GOD.
To all my group members, thank you all so much, you guys did your very very best, i'm so proud of all of you. If anyone is to blame, the person would be me. Starting late, insufficient practice and so on was mainly due to the lack of my time management. Not that i'm looking down on myself or whatever, come to think of it, its just ME.
As a group leader, leadership quality MUST be shown, and that was the exact thing that was BLARINGLY lacking. Just ask any of my group members, i'm sure they'll agree with you without a second thought. The sharing out of tasks and responsibilities weren't equal too. No one's to blame for that because its understandable that some have to go back during the weekends.
To all my group members, i'm sorry if things didn't turn out well. It was obvious that we could have done much better with a little more effort, just as said by ms.chuah. Don't feel depressed or sad or down ya. What's past is past. All i can say is that i'm sorry.
p.s: Thank you God so much for helping me and guiding me throughout this whole process of doing the talkshow and computer studies presentation. You have blessed and given me so much. What more could i ask for? What ever results that comes out, i'll just accept it. I know God has helped me plenty, once again its just me...hehe...I get what i deserve i guess. (A lesson learnt)
As for the computer studies presentation, once again, thank you everyone for their efforts in doing the report and poster. Everyone chipped in. The credit belongs to everyone. Me as the leader, have to say that i'm surprised on the cooperation gave by all of you (group members).
Even right now, before i go to bed, all i want to do is just place everything at God's feet, and rest in His arms. Next week is econs presentation. Better bark up. =) TQ GOD.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Who Am I (2nd song in my playlist)
Who am i
That the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurts
Who am i that the bright and morning stars
Whould choose to light the way
For my ever wondering heart
Not because of who i am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what i've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapour in the wind
Still You Hear me when i'm calling
Lord You catch me when i'm falling
And You told me who i am
I am yours (x2)
Who am i
That the eyes that see our sins
Would look on me with with love
And watch me rise again
Who am i that the voice that calm the sea
Would call out through the rain And calm the storm in me
Not because of who i am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what i've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapour in the wind
Still You Hear me when i'm calling
Lord You catch me when i'm falling
And You told me who i am
I am yours
That the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurts
Who am i that the bright and morning stars
Whould choose to light the way
For my ever wondering heart
Not because of who i am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what i've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapour in the wind
Still You Hear me when i'm calling
Lord You catch me when i'm falling
And You told me who i am
I am yours (x2)
Who am i
That the eyes that see our sins
Would look on me with with love
And watch me rise again
Who am i that the voice that calm the sea
Would call out through the rain And calm the storm in me
Not because of who i am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what i've done
But because of who You are
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapour in the wind
Still You Hear me when i'm calling
Lord You catch me when i'm falling
And You told me who i am
I am yours
Friday, August 7, 2009
A normal day...there must be more than this...
Thinking back of what happened this whole day (Thursday 6 August 2009), I have to say, it was kind of a wasted day for me. As usual, before the day started, I had many things I had in mind that i wanted to do, or in other words, achieve. But at the end of the day, I ended up wasting time and only doing things that are nessesary and appropriate at that moment of time. I felt like i've just wasted one whole day again. Sigh... I feel so useless and wasted. Today was such a beautiful day that God created just so that i can do many beautiful and wonderful things. but ended up wasting it. The spirit was willing, but the flesh was weak.
Upon reaching uni, the only thing i could think of was monday's talkshow. Me, as the public speaking group leader, of course naturally, had to bear certain amount of responsibilities. My whole way cycling to uni, all i was thinking was about how to make my talkshow a better one, a special one. I don't want it to be just something normal, i wanted to think out of the box. I was thinking so much that i almost ran over a cow dunk, or is it buffalo dunk? =) Well, I was kinda disappointed that i couldn't generate any creative ideas, and my group members were expecting something. So all i have to say is that i'm sorry. I'm not usually like that, but then don't know why leh, these few days also like this. Maybe its because I saw some pretty brilliant talkshow performances and i want to be better than them? Or maybe because I miss something or someone? I don't really know. I'm kinda confused now. To my group members, sorry if i sounded a little bit harsh. I know i demanded creativity and perfection. If i pushed any of you too hard, from the bottom of my heart, i'm sorry.
At about 8+- pm, as usual, i went to my church service after my last lecture which ends at 8. Of all days for my lecture to end at 8, THURSDAY, GOSH... the day that my church have a service in kampar, and i have to actually rush just to get there. Worst part is, cause of my late class, i don't get to serve, sad le. Playing guitar, drum, whatever also can la, i just want to serve my Lord. T.T I hope next sem won't be like this le. Well, I went there and had a quick dinner, then went to the service. My father was the one preaching...WOW...keke... Er, his topic was kinda deep. Something about murder? Haha... It was a very interesting topic in all though. Came back, was tired, but see now...i still end up at the table, writing this blog/post, and its already 1 something. Gosh, i didn't realise the time. Thank You God for today..."there must be more than this"...
Upon reaching uni, the only thing i could think of was monday's talkshow. Me, as the public speaking group leader, of course naturally, had to bear certain amount of responsibilities. My whole way cycling to uni, all i was thinking was about how to make my talkshow a better one, a special one. I don't want it to be just something normal, i wanted to think out of the box. I was thinking so much that i almost ran over a cow dunk, or is it buffalo dunk? =) Well, I was kinda disappointed that i couldn't generate any creative ideas, and my group members were expecting something. So all i have to say is that i'm sorry. I'm not usually like that, but then don't know why leh, these few days also like this. Maybe its because I saw some pretty brilliant talkshow performances and i want to be better than them? Or maybe because I miss something or someone? I don't really know. I'm kinda confused now. To my group members, sorry if i sounded a little bit harsh. I know i demanded creativity and perfection. If i pushed any of you too hard, from the bottom of my heart, i'm sorry.
At about 8+- pm, as usual, i went to my church service after my last lecture which ends at 8. Of all days for my lecture to end at 8, THURSDAY, GOSH... the day that my church have a service in kampar, and i have to actually rush just to get there. Worst part is, cause of my late class, i don't get to serve, sad le. Playing guitar, drum, whatever also can la, i just want to serve my Lord. T.T I hope next sem won't be like this le. Well, I went there and had a quick dinner, then went to the service. My father was the one preaching...WOW...keke... Er, his topic was kinda deep. Something about murder? Haha... It was a very interesting topic in all though. Came back, was tired, but see now...i still end up at the table, writing this blog/post, and its already 1 something. Gosh, i didn't realise the time. Thank You God for today..."there must be more than this"...
Monday, August 3, 2009
In a single day
I'm tired...very tired...but on the other hand...i feel quite happy...yet sad at the same time...happy cause i know God's always there for me no matter what happens...leading me, guiding me, comforting me...thank you God...i LOVE You. The sad part...well...its kinda long story...but all this happened in just one day, which is today. Satan has been doing his works among ppl, his main purpose is to kill, steal and destroy. And MAN...has he been doing a hell of a good job. First, 2 of my friends misund each other and now they dun even talk, then, saw another friend of mine...kinda dejected...he doesn't show it but i noe he is...,then little david is hospitalized for high fever...and so on...sigh...when all of these things happen, the only thing dat comes to my mind is PRAYER...and so i prayed...i'm praying even while i'm typing this...i hv faith that God will answer my prayers...all things are possible with God. Satan might hv his fun now but in the end...he will fall...I hv always believed everything happens for a purpose...everything is part of God's wonderful and brilliant plan...to my bro's and sis in christ who are feeling down...just pray and surrender everything at God's feet. Find peace and rest in Him. All i hope for now is for everyone to be happy. I want to see everyone smile, not a fake smile of course. A smile from the heart. =) The bigger the better. I'll be praying for all of my friends. THANK YOU GOD FOR EVERYTHING. =)
Sunday, August 2, 2009
I'M BACK
Finally, after months, or in other words 2 months of not blogging, i finally decided to blog again. Dunno why suddenly hv dis feeling le...mayb cause of influence by somebody?...dunno...blur. Just handed in 4 interesting yet hectic assignments. Econs, acc, computer studies and public speaking outline. Well, i didn't really have a hand in the econs and acc assignments, so to my group members who worked hard in finishing it, thank you all very very much. Phew, feel a little bit tired now but still dun feel like sleeping, cause of something, or some1...hehe...aha. Slept at 4 on friday attempting to finish the public speaking outline. Er, it wasn't actually an attempt, i did finish it by the way. Thank God so much for keeping me healthy and keep filling me with ideas on wat to use as points in my outline. Seeing only me and my friend, Jeff, did the outline, i feel kinda guilty not involving others in it. They were busy in other assignments anyway. So when everyones suppose to noe what "nonsense"(oops, sorry miss chuah) they're suppose to talk about before we even start writing the outline, no one knows anything except me and him. Even though i'm tired, but i noe God will help me in generating more ideas for wat to do during the talksow. All the best to me and my team le...i mean group. =) Life in utar so far...wellllllll...it has been a "wonderful" experience learning in a new environment, meeting new SORTS of ppl and so on, but the thing i'm proud of the most is how much i've grown in the Lord since i came here. Well, you do pray n talk to God more when things aren't going your way right...(keke)...so there i was...an innocent "small", "little" boy wondering what i should do next. Everyones seems to know me, thanks to someone, but i'm actually quite grateful for that. Well, i hope to noe each and everyone better as soon as possible. I'm not the very outgoing type you noe. So...bagi sikit masa la...I'm not shy, but...sometimes...malu a bit la...ERRRRRRRR...WHAT?...lol...dunno what i'm typing and thinking...I hv much much more to say, or in other words type...but oh...look at the time now...should be sleeping soon...TADA for nw...will continue my epic saga...hopefully soon...=)
Monday, May 18, 2009
Wat Now?
Months have passed...Well...D path i'm taking...Honestly...Is d only choice i hv...Aside from form 6...Which i 100% want to avoid...Nw...My future is ahead of me...UTAR...ya...some will be shouting in their hearts...BORING!!!...well...let me tell you...goin to UTAR...is better than staying at home for a few months doing nothingbut rot...BORING!!!...at last i can do something solid...although i dun really like studying...but it beats beating d crap out of d computer handled characters in DOT-A...or even CS...well...i'm VERY VERY excited...but its still a long way to go...thank you God...i'm not sure if this is d path u wanted me to go on...but i noe dat nw dat i've started to journey on this path...i noe He'll bless my decision n choice...ALL THE BEST TO MYSELF...lol...
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